Cattling and intimidating: walking on the street

Watch how men walk down the street. Fast and deliberately, they swirve back and forth, up and down, and right in front of women. They act like they were warriors on a battlefield and not civilians among civilians. They push women. Behind them. From all sides. In the front. You are being pushed to and fro like an autumn leave: it is the male coming through, beware. They push you, literally, according to their direction. Then they go and sit with you in the restaurant and smile all civilized. Is it any wonder everyone hates America? How do American males act? How they treat their Sacred Females? And there is no escape from irrationality and stupidity of a male: even if you are walking peacefully on the right hand side, someone with a steady gaze and unwavering walk walks right into you. He is weaing a suit and works at the Wall Street. Should he not be a little more intelligent? That someone few steps later steps aside and takes proper to his direction position when encounters a male. Are you not supposed to use a gender card? As you cross the street the car almost runs over your foot. It is your light, however. And the car is honking at you. .You look inside and see a contourted face of some guy, who is opening the window now. "Bitch, fucking bitch." It is about 11 in the morning, you feel good, just had your roll and a cup of coffee, but after this you feel good no more....You slowly cross, burdened by hatred and the weight of projections, and he speeds away, leaving a thick cloud of smoke to hover in the air... The guys across the street eye you up and down with displeasure: female, how dare you? And what are YOU talking about? When you are walking by them, one of them takes a loud and swift step towards you, startling you and making you wobble. The guys smile. You are a stupid chick yet again. And the fact that you are a stranger on the street, minding her business is overlooked. Why?
Here is one story that just happened to me this past Tuesday. It was evening time and I was walking on the street. The street was empty and so I allowed myself to relax and go into my thought about my day so far. I caught myself wavering to my left and got back in line as I realized that I may be impeding the oncoming traffic. As I was taking steps to the right, I heard the displeased voice and an irritated attention directed towards me. What is it?! I wondered? There were some guys to my left, walking forward, in the same direction as I was heading into. Why were they upset? My movement could only help them get ahead faster! Then suddenly, I saw a guy straight ahead. He was walking towards me, in my direction rather. Diagonally. Have I not moved previously, I would have ended up being at a point of meeting this guy. I moved because I got back in line, but on the surface it coule appear that I moved to...accomodate this walking in my direction guy. A strange thing happened. Immediately after observing the guy, the men behind me calmed down. I felt the wave of displeasure and hate recede. Why is it? The two parties did not exchange greetings nor did they seem to know one another. Well, in the light of what I have observed so far about American males, a man feels entitled to women's bodies and persons. The patriarchy also mightily struggles to prevent us from becoming conscious and self arising. And at first, before a group of guys has noticed another guy, they perceived that I have CONSCIOUSLY changed my direction! And on my part, to have realized that I was on the wrong side and to have taken action to change the lanes would have meant that I am...a human and thinking! But under the state of patriarchy, this is a no-no.
This is a no-no.
"THOU SHALT NOT BE CONSCIOUS, OH WOMAN." SAYS LORD THY GOD.
"FUCK YOU, LORD MY GOD. I WILL FUCKING PUT YOU IN YOUR UNCONCSIOUS."
SAYS I, MY MASTER.
But to have reacted to an approaching, intimidating guy was ok - I, an unconcsious, bovine and canine and feline creature was expected and in fact commanded to do just that.
I have no right to make consious decissions.
I am nothing. I am a non-entity. I am a woman, a patriarchal A.I.
I have nothing. I own nothing. I am nothing. Who am I?
WHY?